5 Things I Hope My Kids Never Figure Out

Last night I was making dinner and supervising chores (fine, I was yelling threats from the kitchen...) when I said something that I've said many times before. For some reason though, this particular instance made me giggle.  And I decided it would make a good post.  So I present you with...

1. What started it all was when I said to Henry, "What did I tell you would happen if you didn't get that laundry put away."  The reason I laughed is that when I said it he ran quickly from the room, but for the life of me I couldn't remember what would happen if he didn't finish.  I have a couple of go-to "motivators" for each child.  I like to keep the consequences of the actions something logical, so, for example if you don't do your chores, you won't get to watch your TV show because you'll still be finishing what you were supposed to do.  If you don't wash your hands before dinner, you won't be able to sit with us at the table because your germy hands could make everyone sick.  But in this case, I have no idea what I had told Henry.  In the end, it didn't matter because apparently he remembered and he did get his laundry put away.  I just hope my kids never figure out how often I forget which consequences I promised.
2. One thing that Ken likes to roll his eyes at me about is my over-dramatization of lateness.  If we have a particularly busy Saturday where no one gets a nap (or any kind of downtime) I like to get everyone into bed early.  But I know that if I tell them they are going to bed early they will see it as a punishment and resist.  So around dinner, this is what happens, "Hey guys! We need to eat quickly because it's really late and everybody's got to get to bed."  When in fact it is only 5:30.  Or we'll be on our way home and I'll say, "Kids, we are getting home really late tonight, so as soon as we get in the house it's time for jammies and brushing your teeth."  And it's only 6:30. By setting this up early and stressing how late it is, I can get the kids in bed by 7:30 with very few problems.  I just hope my kids never figure out how to tell time.
3. I try to feed my kids a good diet of healthy food. However, I am not perfect about it and we all occasionally indulge in some junk: candy, prepared food, take-out, and fast food.  One thing I have found that helps to prevent temptation in regards to candy and junk food is to just not buy it.  I don't typically have those kinds of food around the house unless there is a specific reason. Around the holidays we get quite the influx of candy, just as I am sure that most of you do.  We put all the candy in one basket and the kids are allowed one piece after dinner if they have finished their meal.  They are pretty good at this rule and Frances and Henry clear their plates almost every night.  I just hope they never figure out how much of their candy I eat!
4. I've seen lots of pictures and videos of kids being naughty all over the Internet.  Some of them have gone viral and brought their parents fifteen minutes of fame.  Some of them are from my own Facebook friends.  I usually give a little chuckle, and then move on.  Sometimes I've gotten a pretty good "LOL, share with your friends" reaction.  But I always hide those pictures from my kids and I never take them myself.  Sure it's cute sometimes, but I know what would happen if I laughed at my kids while they were being bad...they would keep being bad. They would do it over and over again just for the laughs.  So I don't laugh.  Or at least I try really hard not to and I leave the room if necessary.  And we're all in trouble if Ken and I make eye contact!  Some of the naughty things they do are kinda funny, so I hope my kids never figure out how cute they can be when they're being naughty!
5.  Frances is my first born. She's the child that made me a mom. She's my only girl.  She hugs more often than my other kids.  She is just like me in her love of reading, her sense of style, her kindness and love of others.  Henry is my first boy.  He's the one who introduced me to the concept of how harrowing the life of a "boy mom" can be. He climbs things I never thought of as climbable.  He hugs tighter than than my other kids. He is just like me in his sense of curiosity and wonder with the world.  Benjamin is my baby.  He loves his brother and sister fiercely.   He hugs longer than the others.  He is just like me in his love of singing and music.  Sure they all drive me crazy at times, but more importantly I love them.  I love them each in different ways. I love them more than I ever thought I could love another person.  I just hope they never figure out which one I love more! (Because that one doesn't have an answer!)